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"like wrinkledy lemurs"

I've been away from LJ for the last few days while my sister has been visiting, today I teach three classes (including the first meeting of this quarter's "Harry Potter and His Predecessors" class), and then I am heading out first thing tomorrow morning to take part in a four-day colloquium in California on George Orwell. I look forward to catching up with everyone when I return.

In the meantime, here's a fun quote for your amusement and/or edification:

I can believe things that are true and I can believe things that aren't true and I can believe things where nobody knows if they're true or not. I can be believe in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny and Marilyn Monroe and the Beatles and Elvis and Mister Ed. Listen--I believe that people are perfectible, that knowledge is infinite, that the world is run by secret banking cartels and is visited by aliens on a regular basis, nice ones that look like wrinkledy lemurs and bad ones who mutilate cattle and want our water and our women.

I believe that the future sucks and I believe that the future rocks and I believe that one day White Buffalo Woman is going to come back and kick everyone's ass.

I believe that all men are just overgrown boys with deep problems communicating and that the decline in good sex in America is coincident with the decline of drive-in movie theaters from state to state. I believe that all politicians are unprincipled crooks and I still believe that they are better than the alternative. I believe that California is going to sink into the sea when the big one comes, while Florida is going to dissolve into madness and alligators and toxic waste.

I believe that antibacterial soap is destroying our resistance to dirt and disease so that one day we'll all be wiped out by the common cold like the Martians in War of the Worlds.

I believe that the greatest poets of the last century were Edith Sitwell and Don Marquis, that jade is dried dragon sperm, and that thousands of years ago in a former life I was a one-armed Siberian shaman. I believe that mankind's destiny lies in the stars.

I believe that candy really did taste better when I was a kid, that it's aerodynamically impossible for a bumblebee to fly, that light is a wave and a particle, that there's a cat in a box somewhere who's alive and dead at the same time (although if they don't ever open the box to feed it it'll eventually just be two different kinds of dead), and that there are stars in the universe billions of years older than the universe itself.

I believe in a personal God who cares about me and worries and oversees everything I do. I believe in an impersonal god who set the universe in motion and went off to hang with her girlfriends and doesn't even known that I'm alive. I believe in an empty and godless universe of casual chaos, background noise, and sheer blind luck.

I believe that anyone who says that sex is overrated just hasn't done it properly. I believe that anyone who claims to know what's going on will lie about the little things too. I believe in absolute honesty and sensible social lies. I believe in a woman's right to choose, a baby's right to live, that while all human life is sacred there's nothing wrong with the death penalty if you can trust the legal system implicitly, and that no one but a moron would ever trust the legal system.

I believe that life is a game, that life is a cruel joke, and that life is what happens when you're alive and that you might as well lie back and enjoy it.


-from Neil Gaiman, American Gods

Comments

( 12 comments — Leave a comment )
alicambs
Mar. 16th, 2005 08:35 pm (UTC)
What a great quote!
eldritchhobbit
Mar. 17th, 2005 06:10 am (UTC)
So glad you like it! :)
fungus_files
Mar. 16th, 2005 10:18 pm (UTC)
hope it all goes swimmingly, A.

I really gotta get me some Gaiman. it's on my good intentions list but haven't made them reality yet. out of curiosity, what's your fave Gaiman book thus far? I might start with that one. :)
eldritchhobbit
Mar. 17th, 2005 06:12 am (UTC)
Thanks! :) I usually recommend Neverwhere first of the Gaiman books. It's a favorite of mine. The newer Coraline, a so-called "children's book" but with real bite, is also a great introduction to Gaiman, I think. I'm so glad you're thinking of giving him a try. I hope you enjoy his work as I have!
sailingwest
Mar. 17th, 2005 02:09 am (UTC)
What an awesome quote.Thanks for sharing.:-)

Have a safe,successful and fun trip way out to California.
eldritchhobbit
Mar. 17th, 2005 06:13 am (UTC)
Thank you for your kind wishes! :) The good thoughts are most appreciated!
sneezythesquid
Mar. 17th, 2005 06:56 am (UTC)
I had wondered where you had wandered off to. Have fun with the trip and the teaching, and I await with baited breath for your return. I really want to know what you think of my latest thought on BSG.
eldritchhobbit
Mar. 22nd, 2005 11:38 pm (UTC)
Thanks! I think you did a great job spelling out where this could be going in terms of the Cylons' belief in Fate, Prophecy, and God. And if the show's taking its storyline where you predict, it will be mind-blowingly cool. I have to admit that I haven't been as impressed with the execution of the series as you have been: I see a tremendous gap between the promise of the premise and the actual quality of the episodes in terms of writing, pacing, and acting (not a popular opinion, I gather, but there it is). So I'm not holding my breath that it will be as amazing as you expect (maybe they need you on staff!), though I'd love to see it. But I have to admit, your analysis gave me chills. In a good way! :)
sneezythesquid
Mar. 23rd, 2005 11:08 am (UTC)
I'm not holding my breath that it will be as amazing as you expect (maybe they need you on staff!), though I'd love to see it. But I have to admit, your analysis gave me chills. In a good way! :)

Mind if I get a bit floaty with glee for a bit? :)

Getting on a writing staff would just be the coolest!
eldritchhobbit
Mar. 24th, 2005 01:49 pm (UTC)
:) They'd be lucky to have you!
faramirgirl
Mar. 21st, 2005 05:45 am (UTC)
Hello
I loved that quote for the day. And I believe that some of them are true and some were so funny. Thanks.
eldritchhobbit
Mar. 22nd, 2005 11:32 pm (UTC)
Re: Hello
So glad you liked it! :)
( 12 comments — Leave a comment )